It's Time to Get H.O.T.

Think about the situation where you most struggle with comparisons. Now as you consider this life circumstance, answer the following questions. Please take your time as you reflect and respond.


I'm going to get H.O.T and let you guys know that at this season of my life I am struggling with comparing my kids academical weaknesses to other kids academical strengths. Why can't I practice what I preach to my girls? "Don't let those test scores "define" who you are! We are ALL different. Where one has strengths, the other may be weak. Where one is weak, the other may be strong. We are who God made us to be, so embrace who you are and live it honoring Him in all you do." It's so easy for me to offer hope and encouragement to others and at the same time hard to take hold of it for myself. 

4. What does God want me to learn about Him that I might never discover if he were to suddenly pluck me out of this situation?


Hummm... that is something that I've been praying for since this struggle started about three weeks ago and the Lord did reveal to me that I needed to change my focus. I needed more of an "eternal perspective" on things. Worry less on the "earthly" things and focus on what REALLY matters in the end.  

5. What Christlike character traits is He trying to grow in me?


Humility, peace, compassion, faith, endurance are just a few from my very long list!

6. Who is watching, either up close or from afar and discovering what God is like by my reactions to my current situation?

MY GIRLS!!! I'm sure there are others but what I am focused on through this struggle is that my girls see me living out what I preach to them.

7. How might my empathy for others deepen if I go through this current trial with grace and acceptance?

To empathize is to feel how others feel, to see the world as they do. 

Going through this struggle with acceptance and grace has allowed me to view Emma's struggle through her eyes. I kept looking at it through my eyes and worrying about what it looked like in others eyes. In doing that, I would make comments to Emma that tore her heart out. I didn't really realize that I was hurting her until we had our heart to heart and she got H.O.T. with me. She began to tell me that when I would say things to her such as, "Really, Emma?", "Duhhhh!" or the worse one "Seriously Emma, what part of that do you not understand?" it made her believe what she was already thinking.. that she was dumb.  YES, I know... I'm a bad mom! Honestly, I say that to people other than her as well not meaning anything by it but when it is said to someone that already feels "dumb" or "not as good as others" it wreaks havoc on their self esteem. Ohhhhhh, to know that I did that to my own daughter has tore my heart out! Why didn't I see that? How did I not see that? Because I was too focused on trying to hide our struggle and look as if we had it all together. I was focused on what our struggle looked like through others eyes instead of looking at it through Emma's eyes and embracing it as a challenge given to us by God so that we would draw near to Him as a family.

 8. What is God trying to say to me, not by the outcome, but through the voyage?

Be thankful for this struggle, it has put me on my knees at His feet! 
Be sensitive to Emma - see it as she sees it.
Look to Him instead of looking at others.
Stop comparing my "yucks" with other people and their "yays". 
Focus more and put more energy into building christ-like characteristics in my girls - take more of an eternal perspective